Swati Sandeep Naam- What happened after Ayu found out about SS identity? Unexplored scenes.

In the quiet of the night, the boy sat on the windowsill, bathed in the soft glow of moonlight. His gaze was fixed on the twinkling stars above, his heart weighed heavy with regrets. The stars seemed to mock him, their brilliance a stark contrast to the shadows that enveloped his soul. There was a tempest raging inside his heart.

He traced the outline of a star on the glass, its cold surface a reminder of his own isolation. The brilliance of the star came with the price of loneliness. He was learning it the hard way. Tears pooled in his eyes.

“Why?” he whispered. “Why did I not listen to Bhabhi?”

The stars remained silent, their ancient light offering no solace.

His Bhabhi had warned him that it would happen. He had not heeded her warning. She had told him that keeping secrets can destroy relationships and urged him to be honest with his Big-B, but his fear overwhelmed him. His Big-B was his best friend, the first person to accept him for himself. For Ayu, his illegitimacy did not matter. All that mattered to Big-B was that Aditya was his younger brother. Ayu didn't care that Adi was different. He didn't mind Adi’s reluctance to socialize. Ayu never made Adi feel like a freak or unwanted. He made room for him and made sure to tell him that he loved him every day.

Since the day they had bonded, Adi never had to be alone. Ayu made sure he always had company. He made sure to call Adi regularly, even when he went out with friends, to check that Adi was not feeling lonely. Never for a second did Adi feel left out when Ayu was around. All his life, Adi lived with the knowledge that he was the unwanted child. His father’s death did not change the knowledge for him. He was thrust into Arnav’s care without his consent.

Life changed for him after that. He was aware that his elder brother loved him, but he couldn't help but wonder if Arnav would have accepted him if their father hadn't forced him to make the promise. Tears threatened again, but Aditya blinked them off. That promise bound him to his siblings. In a way, he had to be grateful to their dying father. The man did a lot of things wrong, but giving his responsibility to Arnav was the only favor he ever did him.

He was given a beautiful family, and he loved all his siblings, but Ayu was his only solace. His guiding light, his friend, his anchor. Until the moment Ayu stepped back, Adi did not realize how much he loved his Big-B. Every second that they spent apart was a punishment. He could take the fists any day, but his Big-B’s silence cut deep.

In a way, he had brought it upon himself. His Big-B could tolerate many things, but lies were not one of them. Adi knew that very well, and yet he had lied by omission. He justified himself by claiming that he wasn't lying, but simply withholding the truth. However, in the end, he suffered the consequences.

He was the Secret Superstar. Adi closed his eyes against the tears that threatened to spill over. He should have told the truth to his Big-B himself. Ayu deserved to learn the truth from him. He did not know what he was doing. He had no excuse for what happened. But still, it hurt to think that his one foolishness cost him the love of the brother he admired so much. The thought of losing Ayu terrified him. He could take any punishment. He was ready to beg if he had to, but Ayu was too upset to listen to his pleas.

He was so upset that he had gone over to his friend’s place to spend the night, something else that hurt Adi. His Big-B had moved in with him after he realized about the nightmares. Adi frequently suffered from nightmares. His father’s death was still a big shock. Though Adi never loved his father, the man was the only family he had known. Losing him made Adi vulnerable and left him scared, resulting in those frightening nightmares.

His family was worried about his condition. His Big-B spent night after night in his room, talking to him, holding him through those nightmares. Only his Big-B knew his darkest fears, understood his insecurities. Ayu knew every dirty detail about his past and yet never let it change their equation. He loved him despite everything, and in the end, Adi betrayed him.

“I am sorry, Big-B,” Adi whispered in a broken voice. “I am really sorry for everything. Please ek chance de do. Please. Main aapko shikayat ka koi mauka nahi dunga. Bas ek chance de do aap. (Give me one chance, Big-B. I will not give you a reason to complain again.)”

Adi cried silently. His hands started to shake. Adi knew he was getting another panic attack, and that scared him more. It was Ayu who coached him through the panic attacks. It was Ayu who made sure he had pills on time. It was Ayu he held on to when he was falling apart. Without Ayu, he felt lost.

“Adi,” Arnav’s warm voice penetrated through the haze of guilt. Adi looked up as his Bhaiya walked in, looking worried. He wiped his tears immediately. It was not only Ayu he had hurt with his lies; Arnav was also equally upset with him. The only reason why Arnav was talking to him was because he had suffered from a panic attack. Adi did not want the pity. He did not want to be tolerated because they were worried about him. He wanted to be loved, something that would never happen. Fate was never kind to him. He lost everyone who loved him.

He never got to see his mother. His uncle and aunt raised him until he was seven. His aunt loved him, at least he thought she did. She passed away when he was only three, leaving him alone with the monster who called himself his uncle. His father took him away from the monster but could never love him. Adi was starved for love, and when Ayu offered love unconditionally, he was left shocked and scared. He was terrified that he would lose his Big-B’s love, and in the end, his fears came true.

“Adi, look at me, beta.” Arnav crouched before him and held his hand gently. Adi looked at him with tear-glossed eyes. He could see Arnav’s lips moving, but he could not hear the words. The attack was well underway, making him numb to everything else.

Arnav wrapped his arms around the shaking boy and pulled him to his chest. He called out to Priya when Aditya did not stop shaking. Priya rushed in with Anirudh. They looked tense as they saw Arnav rubbing warmth into the boy's palms.

“Phir se? (Again?)” Anirudh frowned.

Arnav looked at his wife. They shared the same worry. The fight between the boys was turning ugly. They could not take sides, but Adi’s condition worried them more.

“Doctor ko call karu? (Should I call the doctor?)” Priya sounded worried.

Anirudh shook his head. The doctor was of no help. What the boy needed was his Big-B. Anirudh did not want anything to do with Aditya, but he could not ignore a child’s distress. He walked away to call Ayushmaan. He had to come back, or Adi would not sleep the whole night.

“There is no need for the doctor,” Arnav rose from Aditya’s side. Priya took his place immediately. The lack of color on Aditya’s face worried her. She reached for his hands, but the boy sat there completely oblivious to her presence.

“He needs some fresh air, Priya,” Arnav walked to Aditya’s closet and grabbed a coat. “I will take him to the beach.”

“He has not eaten anything, Arnav.”

“He is in no state to eat,” Arnav shook his head. “Once he feels better, I will make sure he eats a decent meal. Don’t wait for us. You and Ani have dinner.”

Priya nodded her head. Arnav gently helped Aditya to his feet and assisted him in putting on the jacket. Aditya went through the motions like a zombie, not even asking Arnav where he was taking him. Priya’s heart hurt for the boy, but she knew she would not be able to help him in any way. Adi had complete trust in her husband. She had to have faith in the boy’s trust.

Arnav wrapped an arm around the boy and guided him out. Priya prayed that the boys would settle their differences soon. She loved them both, and both of them were hurting. She could not bear to see them in distress. Only Arnav could make the boys understand.

Arnav, on the other hand, was filled with worry. He had raised two teenagers on his own, but with Aditya, he was facing a steep learning curve. Both Anirudh and Ayushmaan were rebellious. They made it a point to defy his every command. He did not have to watch his words and actions with his siblings; they knew to give back as hard as they got. Aditya, on the other hand, took everything silently.

He was even apprehensive to raise his voice to the boy. Aditya did not know how to differentiate between anger, concern, and abuse. That was an alarming problem. To add on, he had trust issues. They had their work cut out for them.

Arnav opened the car door for Aditya. The boy gave him a blank look.

“Baith, bacha, beach ho atey hai. (Sit, bacha. Let’s go to the beach.)”

Aditya sat down without a word. Arnav did not know if the boy was willing or not, but he could not leave him to suffer. Adi needed a little distraction, and the beach always calmed him. Like them, he loved the beach.

The ride to the beach was in silence. Arnav waited for Aditya to say something, but the boy did not react. He opened the sunroof in the hope of diverting Adi’s attention, but nothing worked. Arnav felt sad. He would give anything to see Aditya behave like a normal teenager, but that seemed like a distant dream. He had to be patient with the boy.

Once they reached the beach, Arnav had to once again coax Aditya into getting out of the car. Aditya was not interested. He wanted to go back to his room and cry in peace. The panic attack had subsided the moment Arnav had taken him into his arms. All he felt now was gut-wrenching pain. He did not cry when he lost his father; he could not even muster a tear. The thought of losing his Big-B left him numb with pain.

Arnav held his hand and guided him to the beach. The waves were unusually turbulent, reflecting Aditya’s inner turmoil. It was a full moon night. The waves reflected the silvery moonlight, looking enticing, but the beauty was lost on Aditya.

“Baith. (Sit),” Arnav gestured to the bench. Aditya sat down silently. Arnav wrapped his arms around the boy and pulled him closer. “Ayu is upset, Adi.” He addressed the issue gently. Adi looked down. It was becoming impossible to hold back the tears.

“Give him a little time, bacha. He will calm down soon. Then you can explain to him why you kept the truth from him.”

“Aap bhi gussa ho na? (Are you upset with me?)” Aditya dared to ask.

Arnav caressed his hair gently. “Why did you hide the truth from us, Adi? You knew how much Ayu admired the SS. He was desperate to meet the guy. SS was his idol, bacha. You are your Big-B’s idol.”

Adi shook his head furiously.

“That is the truth, Adi. Ayu admires the SS. You know that too. So when he found out that you are the SS, he felt betrayed. Anyone in his place would feel the same. Why did you keep the truth from him? From us? I don’t understand, beta. Don’t you trust us?”

Aditya’s eyes filled with helplessness. He did not know how to explain. Arnav saw the tears and once again felt lost. He did not know what more to say to the boy. He was walking on eggshells around him. He had never felt so helpless in his life. His eyes misted. He looked away to hide it from Aditya.

When he felt the boy wrap his arms around him, he looked down, startled. Aditya did not like to be touched. He was very comfortable hugging Ayu, but when it came to him, he was always cautious.

“I am sorry, Bhaiya,” Aditya buried his face into Arnav’s chest. “I am sorry for everything. I did not want to hurt Big-B. I did not want to hurt you.” His voice broke.

Arnav pulled him closer. “I know, bacha. But I do not understand why you kept the truth from us. Can you tell me?”

Aditya remained silent. Arnav let him take his time. He could see that Aditya was ready to talk. He did not want to rush the boy. It took ten minutes for Aditya to gather his courage. He thought Arnav would force him to talk, but Arnav’s patience was something that he found comforting. His father was not a patient man. When he asked a question, he expected an immediate response. And if Aditya did not wish to respond, his father punished him immediately. Sushant Oberoi never tolerated disrespect. With Arnav, everything was different. He was learning that he could be himself with his Bhaiya without fearing consequences.

“I wanted Big-B to love me as Adi,” Aditya whispered his secret. Arnav looked down with a frown. Priya had explained the same logic, but he did not understand it at all. They all loved Aditya for himself. The boy did not need to hide a part of his identity to earn that love.

“And what made you think that Ayu would love you any less for being the SS?”

“Big-B adores the SS,” Aditya rose in agitation. Arnav rose with him. He wanted to look at the boy, to understand what was troubling him.

“And that is bad?”

Aditya shook his head. He did not know how to explain it to Arnav, and that made him nervous.

“Talk, bacha. How will I understand if you do not tell me?”

“You will become upset, Bhaiya.”

“I promise not to become upset, Adi. I want to understand why you did it. I want to know if we are going wrong somewhere.”

Aditya shook his head furiously. He was messing up everything. They were doing everything right. It was he who was messed up.

“Adi…”

“I wanted Big-B to like me as Aditya. The boy who is nothing but trouble and messed up.”

“Adi?” Arnav was shocked to hear the words.

“That is the truth, Bhaiya. I am messed up. I have a twisted mind. I am an illegitimate child. I should not have been born…”

“Stop it,” Arnav could not contain his anger. Those words shocked him. “Don’t you ever say that again, Aditya.”

Aditya flinched. Arnav immediately realized his mistake. He had promised Aditya he would not become upset, and now he was losing his cool. He took a deep breath to calm his emotions. He loved the boy. He hated seeing the self-loathing. One day, Aditya would believe that he was much more than an illegitimate child. He would believe that he was a beautiful human being who was loved by his family, but for that to happen they all needed to be patient with him. Actions speak louder than words. They had to show Aditya how much he was loved. Only then would he believe.

Actions! Apology was something that Arnav found hard to give. He did not know why, but he found it hard to apologize. A simple word, but it always got caught in his throat. He was always a responsible child. He did not remember having to apologize to his parents. With his siblings, he never had to apologize. If he went overboard, he compensated in leaps and bounds, but he avoided apologizing. With his wife, everything was easy. Priya was the most accommodating woman in the world. He never had to apologize to her. His friends were his equals and there was no place for gratitude and apology in friendship.

He looked at the boy cowering before him. The child had suffered enough trauma. Arnav put his ego aside and held Aditya’s hand.

“I am sorry I yelled, Adi.” The words did not seem so difficult when he offered them to Aditya, his brother, his child! The realization both humbled and scared him. He did not realize when the boy became so important to him.

Aditya looked up, shocked. Never before had anyone apologized to him for raising their voice.

“I promised you I would not get mad,” Arnav sighed. “But I lost my cool….”

“It’s okay, Bhaiya….”

“It’s not okay, Adi. When you give your word, you keep it, or you do not make a promise at all. I am sorry I could not control my temper. You said... You are much more than what you are making yourself out to be, Adi. You are much more to us. You are our brother.” My child. Arnav did not say it out loud. He knew Aditya was not ready to hear it and neither was he ready to confess his feelings. They needed time.

“We are a family,” he said instead. “That is all the validation we need. We love you because you are one of us, Adi. You being SS has nothing to do with our feelings. For Ayu, you are his younger brother first. Tu Ayu ko nahi janta, bacha. Uske dil me jo hai, wahi uske zabaan pe bhi hota hai. (You don't know Ayu well, bacha. The boy speaks his heart). He never pretends. He is honest and expects complete honesty in return. The only reason he is so upset with you is that he thinks you betrayed his trust. Sit with him, talk to him. Explain why you kept the truth from him….”

“Woh mujhse baat hi nahi karna chahte, Bhaiya. (He does not want to talk to me, Bhaiya.) He hates me.”

Arnav shook his head. The boys were taking it too far. He was about to say something when his phone buzzed. He quickly answered the phone call when he saw Ayu's number. Ayu was at his friend's place for a sleepover. He never called when he was with Advaik.

“Where are you, Bhaiya?” Ayu did not wait for him to greet him.

“At the beach. Is everything fine, bacha?” Arnav frowned. He could hear the worry in Ayu’s voice.

“Is he with you?” Ayu lowered his voice.

“Who?”

“Adi.”

“Yes.”

“Did he have his dinner?”

Arnav sighed and looked at Aditya. The boy believed that Ayu despised him. He put the call on the speaker. Adi needed to know how much his Big-B loved him.

“No, he did not.”

“Take him to the dumb biryani place. He will eat. Bhaiyu was saying that he did not have his lunch properly. He will fall sick again.”

Aditya looked taken aback. His Big-B was worried about him. His eyes misted. Even when he was mad at him, he was making sure he was taken care of, like he always did. How could he think that Ayu hated him?

Arnav saw the tears in Adi’s eyes and shook his head. “I don’t think he is in the mood to eat, Ayu.”

“You insist that we should not skip meals, Bhaiya. Make him toe the line. We are halfway through the project. It will take me two more hours. I will come back as soon as I am done. Adi sleeps at 11. If I am not back by then, can you stay with him until I come back?”

“I thought you were going to stay over.”

There was a slight pause. Adi’s eyes overflowed with tears. Ayu’s love left him shocked.

“I want to, but he will think I am doing this to punish him,” Ayu sounded agitated. “He is dumb, Bhaiya. Why couldn't I have a smarter younger brother?”

“But you still love him?”

“As if I have a bloody choice.”

Adi heard enough. He ran away from there. He needed a moment to himself. Arnav saw him go and signaled the security to trail him. They would know to keep their distance. Aditya could have his privacy, and he would not have to worry about the boy's safety.

“Bhaiya, are you there?”

“What did I say about swearing, young man?” Arnav deliberately changed the subject. He did not want Ayu to know what transpired. He knew Ayu would not appreciate the interference.

“Come on, Bhaiya, bloody is not a curse.”

“Do you want to write an essay on why not to curse?”

“You are worse than my English teacher, Bhaiya. No, thank you. Bloody is a curse word. Duly noted. I will not use it again. Happy?”

“Maybe,” Arnav smiled. His child never failed to make him smile. Ayu’s charm never fails.

“Aapne dinner kiya? (Did you have dinner?)”

“I will, once we go back home. Adi was upset….”

“Teach him that being upset has nothing to do with skipping meals. Show him that infamous ‘Arnav Oberoi Attitude.’ Trust me, he will never again behave like a brat.”

“Really?”

Ayu sighed. “Leave it. Bhabhi will make sure he eats. Don’t go overboard, okay? He is just a kid.”

“So are you, beta.”

There was silence again.

"Are you alright, Ayu?" Arnav's voice softened. “If you need time to calm yourself, stay over. I will bunk with Adi tonight….”

“You don’t know how the dumbo’s mind works, Bhaiya. He will assume the worst. It’s okay, I will be home as soon as I can.”

“When you love him so much, why don’t you let it go, Ayu? Your silence is hurting him more.”

“His silence hurt me too, Bhaiya.”

“Ayu….”

“It’s between me and Adi, Bhaiya. Let us handle it. Please. I am not ready to forgive him yet. If you ask me to, I will not be able to say no….”

“I love you both, Ayu. Which means I will not take sides. I do not want to see either of you hurt. No matter who hurts, bacha, I will hurt with them. So do your Bhaiya a favor and sort this out fast. Okay?”

“I will,” Ayu assured him.

Arnav disconnected the call and made his way back to Aditya. He could not leave the boy alone for long. He saw the boy crying in the car and felt a pang in his heart. He should have known that Adi would do just that. He gestured for the security to move away. He did not want anyone prying on Adi when he was so vulnerable. Once they moved away, Arnav opened the door and pulled the boy into his embrace. He relaxed when instead of stiffening in his arms, Adi buried his face into his midriff and held on. That was progress.

“Now you know your Big-B does not hate you. Right?” He whispered gently. Adi could only nod his head.

“Then you should also know that your Big-B hates tears.” He pulled back and wiped Adi’s eyes. “If you want to pacify your Big-B, you have to find another way. This will only make him close off.”

Adi felt lost. He tried everything. He did not know what else could work.

“Don’t fret, Adi. Ayu will not be able to stay mad for long. Let him vent it out. Once he lets out the steam, he calms down pretty soon. You will soon have your Big-B back. But once he is ready to talk, make sure you tell him why you kept the truth. Ayu will not ask, but he needs to know, Okay, Adi?”

Adi bobbed his head again, feeling much better.

“And no more skipped meals. You need to make it up to Ayu, not make him mad.”

Adi sighed. He did not feel like eating when he was upset, but his Bhaiya was right. He could not make his Big-B more upset. Now that he knew how much his Big-B loved him, he was even more terrified to lose the love. He wanted his Big-B back. Desperately. He could do anything to get back into Ayu’s good books. Just anything! He was determined to win his Big-B back.